A Busy Highway A.K.A. Existing

And I do remember that day.
I was grateful to you.
Or at least to your Name.

How is it-
I hold It?

Now?

In less than 10 minutes I can recall more than 2 decades past-
Will it be so when I’m 60?

This coming had better not course too fast.
Now?

16 from now!

It, wills to Be
as is Now.

Perhaps
Now-

Index finger tips
to thumb pads-
supinated palms,
wrists on knees,
thighs crossed,
eyes shut,
heart gaping…

If, in the sigh that might follow my
last inbreath
I will think again of You
as I did at 36
3 a.m.

IT’S…JUST….Only that

I don’t feel like talking about it.
So let’s refer to me as she.
There. That’s better.

She don’t feel like talking about it.
Uh? Wait.
She didn’t feel like talking about it.
So let’s refer to her as me.

Well, that doesn’t make me feel like talking about it all that much more, but let me see..

Where shall me begin? I mean, her. Where shall she begin?
Self Care.
That’s where.
It’s at.
Loving.
Is what I got.
I said, “remember that!”

Well, don’t give me the credit for the 3 lines above, those are lyrics (90s song?). I thinks. I mean, she thinks.
Me, too, I think.

I care for her. I always will.
She loved me. Child, I think.
She always has.
She always has me.
Me in mind.
With me on her mind.
Mindfulness.

Self Care.
She cares.

Me, too, I think.

I used to feel like talking about it all of the time.
I used to feel like talking.
I used to feel.
Self Care.

When and where
I felt like me.
Whenever I talked.
I talked like her.
She talked like me.
She talked.
She liked to..
Me..

“She liked me,” I heard her say,
so then I wrote it:

“She cares.”
Self Care.

Yes.
Me.
I care.

I care so much that I have spent the last several days thinking about her.
Thinking about how much I care.
How much I care about her Self.

She is me.

I am her..
Child.
Her caring.
About Self.
Caring about how early I have to wake up in the morning.
Three.
Well not that I have to, but I do almost every morning.
Wake up at three.
To check on me.

I care about me.

I know about the dark at 3 AM.
I know too, about the light that’s on.
On the other side.
And I care.

I care that Light is there.
It knows I care about it.
I do.
I know.
Here and now.
I know
I know
I KNOW

She cares
for her
Self.
and for she cares for me, even at 3.

My Self Care wasn’t always there.
Not at 3 in the morning.
That’s when I used to sleep.
“Me too,” she said to me, “I too, used to sleep at three.” Then she asked, “What about her?”
Does she care?

Let’s ask if she feels like talking about it.
About Self care.
You ask her.
I will.
Are you asking?
I am…

I am all three:

Mind
Body
Spirit

I cannot neglect any
one
of Me.

Not before,
Not now,
Not after.

I am caring.
I Am Self.

In this lifetime
observer


more so than 


participant.




An assignment?



Hold that 

thought.



Lanes shift

up ahead.




Palm creases-



calm ceases-

two pieces-




remaining.




There.




Here.





It is


Isn’t it?





foolish 


to

dart




across


a
busy


highway.


-SPG

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